The Ironborn men are promised safe passage in return for their surrender. Theon marches through with a white flag to negotiate terms of surrender on behalf of Ramsay and his army. Turns out, Moat Cailin is the Worst Place In The World: flies buzzing over corpses, sick guys coughing, lots of grey. As you might remember from a few episodes back, his father Roose Bolton ordered Ramsay to prove himself by securing Moat Cailin for House Bolton. His torturer Ramsay Snow is preparing him to go to Moat Cailin. HeвЂ™s still got that same shaken abused puppy look though. Somewhere in the North, the boy formerly known as Theon Greyjoy, Reek, is playing the role of, uh, Theon Greyjoy. SheвЂ™s glad her saw her, heвЂ™s glad too, and itвЂ™s all very sweet because they like each other even though you do not, repeat, DO NOT spy on bathing girls. Grey Worm: 'If the masters never cut me, I never am Unsullied, I never stand in the Plaza of Pride when Daenerys Stormborn orders us to kill the masters, I never am chosen to lead the Unsullied, I never meet Missandei from the island of Naath.'ДЄW. Later he apologizes and she tells him sheвЂ™s sorry too, that the masters cut him to become Unsullied. She notices and stares back, covering her lady bits. Or as Daenerys Targaryen later describes them, their pillars, as in their pillars and stones. (Penis.) This is, of course, assuming that they still have their manhoods. WhereвЂ™s the gender equality, HBO? More importantly, WHEREвЂ™S THE PENIS? Give the people what they want. A few feet away, Missandei and some other ladies are completely naked. The Unsullied plunge into the lake to bathe, half naked, still wearing their pants. Unlike the NightвЂ™s Watch-their army of 102 is no match for Mance RayderвЂ™s incoming 100,000-person gang. They comfort Samwell by reminding him of all the other things Gilly has survived: her dad, the march to The Wall, a White Walker. Jon Snow and the other NightвЂ™s Watch-ers are upset too-the Wildlings killed three of their own in the brothel raid and, because of orders to stay, they canвЂ™t go out and avenge them, let alone defend themselves. He blames himself for what he assumes is GillyвЂ™s death. The next day, Samwell TarlyвЂ™s single tear is the saddest tear of all.

(PS-why do these guys have to kill everyone? TheyвЂ™re trying to get to Castle Black, yes, but do they have to kill every innocent person they find first? CanвЂ™t they just sneak past them?) ItвЂ™d be a sweet gesture if there werenвЂ™t blooding seeping through the ceiling. Ygritte sticks a spear through the Mean Girl but spares Gilly and her baby, motioning for them to keep quiet. But the final season is still weeks away, so we may as well hold on to our pipe dreams for a happy ending as long as we can.GillyвЂ™s been paying attention and hauls ass to a safe hiding spot just in time for the Wildling army to run through and kill everyone. Martin tends to shun happy endings like he shuns deadlines for his books, itвЂ™s unlikely anyone whoвЂ™s been a strong contender for the throne thus far will actually end up ruling Westeros. RELATED: Why Game of Thrones Recast Daario Naharis in Season 4Д«etween his quick wit, his caring natureВ and his vast experience in the upper echelons of Westerosi politics, there are plenty of reasons Tyrion Lannister deserves the Iron Throne.

But come May, we're going to have to find something else to talk about with our peers, because the final season of Game of ThronesВ is just around the corner. It's what makesВ lunch not quite as awkward with those colleagues you haveВ nothing else in common with. It's what bringsВ friend groups together every Sunday night.

It's what families discuss at the dinner table. For the last 8 years, Game of Throneshas been at the forefront of popular culture.

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